“FIND YOUR PURPOSE!”
So sick of hearing these words put together because there seems to be so many ways to find IT.
Yet I still so badly want IT – whatever MY PURPOSE was supposed to be…
Of course many of us live lives of quiet desperation or worse. Frustrated by our crappy jobs, sick of our circumstances, helpless, confused and feeling trapped. We wonder if you will ever find our “Purpose”.
For me it became like finding mythical creatures. I thought I saw glimpses… well maybe – I definitely felt its presence though. That I can say for sure. Well maybe. Come to think of it – maybe the beer I was drinking at the time had something to do with it.
Damnit!
Finally I had enough and instead of focusing on the next method I decided to take matter in my own hands and I started focusing on hobbies and interests – some that I had long since let go.
At least with these felt like I would find something joyful – who knows where it would lead.
Then something strange happened.
Joy happened. Inexplicable flow. Maybe this was it? Could it be so simple?
Then by chance I picked up a book that caught my eye on the shelf while looking for another.
I would not normally have even considered it – especially due to its cheap cover art and the fact that it used the most cliche’d words in the world – “Boot Camp” and “Purpose” and “Life”.
Dear God, could it be more repellent to people jaded from the search?
And so “Life Purpose Boot Camp” by Eric Maisel came into my life.
So I made a video.
As the video discusses, individuals often try to find meaning by trying to participate in tasks that are considered meaningful. But as Eric discusses, this is the wrong way of trying to find meaning and purpose in life because something that may feel meaningful today will not necessarily feel as meaningful tomorrow.
There are no such guarantees in life especially when “meaning” is an emotion.
He believes that a more appropriate term to use in this case would be ‘meaning opportunities’. This allows us to manage our expectations when beginning an activity and also allows us to be emotionally detached from it to a certain degree. That way, when it begins to lose meaning or when it does not turn out the way we expected it to; we will not feel as disappointed as we would have been.
There are a few steps we can take to make sure that we can take to allow us to have meaning and purposeful lives. The first is to always write down all past and present activities that we consider meaningful and important. Writing them down changes everything because it prompts us to take a moment and reflect. Through this reflection, we will be able to think critically about the different activities we have participated in throughout our lives and separate them with regard to the above named criteria. Making this separation allows us to create a list of activities that we genuinely enjoy and are unlikely to regret even if they do not turn out as expected.
Once they have been written down, wecan proceed to pick out different activities to do each day. The author states that when we have such a list and alternate between the activities on the list, we will be able to continuously find purpose and meaning in our lives. We will have created a cycle where every action we take is taken with the aim of fulfilling a task that we hold dear.
We will be able to approach life wit
h purpose and value everything we do which in turn reduces the amount of time spent wondering whether we are doing the right thing or not. In the book, the author refers to this process as creating ‘meaning investments’. This makes sure that we know there is a chance we might not get what we expected but it should not reduce our enthusiasm and does not reflect poorly on our lives.
The second step is to design your perfect day. By that, the author means that you should write down what you consider the most fulfilling activities that can be achieved in a single day. Although it is close to impossible to make sure that we only do what we consider important and fulfilling, this exercise will allow us to figure out what we truly hold dear and what we consider mundane.
After this is done, we will need to space out these activities. For example, if you love to paint, you should set aside a certain number of hours each week to focus on painting. Increasing the frequency of activities that we find meaningful is sufficient to make a change to our perception of life.
Another common misconception most people have about finding meaning in life is monetary gains. Whenever we do something, we tend to think about how much money we are likely to make/ lose while we are at it. This school of thought eventually alters how we think and how we approach activities which make a lot of things lose value. Not everything we do in life is about the money. It is possible for individuals to participate in activities that have absolutely no monetary gain but matter enough to make a change in our lives and in that of others. For example, community service is not profitable when it is viewed from a business perspective. However, it is one of the best ways to make sure that our community is safe and acceptable to the society.
Last but not least, we should also write down all the areas that we would like to improve on in our daily lives. These activities may range from learning a new language to spending more time with our loved ones. One should always have a mental picture of whom they are and who they would like to be, and then follow through by taking steps to ensure that he or she is closer to that image each day. With this kind of activity, there should not be any timelines or deadlines. Deadlines tend to create unnecessary anxiety that is distracting and will prevent one from enjoying the process. All one has to do is to create smaller milestones to be achieved periodically that will eventually lead to the ultimate goal of being the best versions of ourselves. It is impossible to go wrong with self improvement exercises.
Trying to find meaning and purpose in life is something that should not be taken for granted. A lot of people deal with this problem in their day to day lives and some take drastic measures just to try and find purpose.
There is no need for it.
Following the steps allows you to manage your time and change your mindset which will in turn give purpose and meaning to your life each day.
Now we can all be human again and stop seeking mythical creatures!