Escaping the Rat Race: 5 Steps to Live Life on Your Terms
Ever feel like you’re just going through the motions, stuck in a cycle that’s going nowhere?
I’ve been there too.
My wake-up call came in the middle of a workday as I stared at a cow walking by – it might sound strange, but ultimately it was clear to me that that cow who just going about her business – seemed way happier than me.
How did I get to this?
I wondered why I felt that way and I realised that everything that had happened to me was 100% my own choice.
The long stressful days, the unfulfilling work, the feelings that it was my bosses and customers who were in control – not me. Meanwhile, the cow did have to give up her milk each day and she did have a life of service to humanity but for the most part, she wandered happily through the fields all day.
And that is what finally snapped me out of autopilot. The cow didn’t have much choice – but I did!
The Rat Race Was Slowly Killing Me: My Rollercoaster Journey in Engineering
Like a lot of people, I grew up believing that success meant good grades, university (or college for you Americans), and landing a stable job. I pushed myself through the hardest math classes in high school, thinking they’d be my ticket to a solid future.
Even just getting into University for me was a struggle. I distinctly remember my year eleven math teacher handing back a math test, and in front of the whole class said said, “Quinn, you’ll do well in life… just not here. Maybe in the arts department.” I was gutted! But I used it like rocket fuel to get serious about studying.
Somehow I got into engineering school and managed to graduate in 4 years, despite the odds. But just as I was ready to launch my career, the 1992 recession hit, and the job interviews (I’d worked so hard to get) just vanished overnight.
Desperate for a shot, I moved to a bigger city and spent months working as a waiter while I read a book titled, “What Color is Your Parachute” and the job hunt became a life of its own. Eventually, after calling some employers offering to volunteer, I got a gig managing a concrete plant—trucks, crews, tight deadlines, the whole deal.
The stress was relentless, and it started to wear me down. I was managing a team and coordinating a fleet of trucks – a role that came with a lot of stress. The pressure to stay on schedule was constant as project managers were quick to remind me that any delays would cost my company penalties.
Every day was a challenge, but some days were insane – one time a truck caught fire, on another day one tipped over with a full load of concrete and when it was raining another day I had trucks slide off and ended up in ditch.
The most stressful moment came from a mistake I made with the concrete mix. Because of the hot climate, we had to add a special additive to slow the setting time so the concrete stayed workable longer. Without realizing it, I’d added the retarder twice, doubling its effect.
A few days later, I got a call that my batch hadn’t gone hard. And this wasn’t just any concrete; it was for a bridge pylon, a key part of the structure’s foundation. Construction didn’t stop, more formwork got added and more steel – ready for the next lot of concrete. For a month, I was shitting bricks, hoping the 30-day test would somehow show it had set properly. Thankfully, when the results came in, it passed and the bridge project was moving ahead as planned. The only thing lost was a few years of my life.
Then the cow incident.
That was it – I realized I needed to start living life on my own terms, not just chasing what I thought I “should” be doing.
For me, I didn’t really have a plan and I traveled overseas.
Honestly, it all worked out great, but in retrospect and after many years in recruitment, I realise a simple plan would have been far more effective at putting me on the right track faster.
And that is what these next five steps are:
Five Steps to Live Life on Your Terms
- Picture Where You’re Headed Take a minute to imagine where your current path is leading. Write it down in detail. Does this path actually make you happy? If you keep following it, where will you be in five years?
- Dream Up Your Ideal Life Forget about what seems realistic for a second—just picture the life you want. Imagine how it’d feel to wake up excited to start the day. This step isn’t about the “how”; it’s just about creating a vision that inspires you.
- Figure Out Your Why Your “why” is what’ll keep you moving forward. Whether it’s wanting more freedom, personal happiness, or to make a difference, let that be the thing that motivates you. For me, the idea of staying in a draining job where I could not imagine a happy future self was worse than any risk of leaving it behind.
- Make a Rough Plan After my “cow moment,” I decided to travel, working in hospitality in Canada and later as a recruiter in the UK which ultimately led me to work in my own business. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s just moving forward. If you’re young, like I was it can be helpful to remember that new jobs, different countries, and creating businesses is a hell of a lot easier when you don’t have a mortgage to pay, school fees and whatever else life brings. If you’ve got bigger responsibilities that can be great too because now you have some great experience to use. Look for options like side hustles, consulting or even freelancing that don’t require burning any bridges but where you can learn the many other things you will need to be successful in your new endeavor.
- Start with One Small Step This part is everything. What’s one small action you could take today that aligns with your vision? Maybe it’s starting a side hustle, saving a buffer for the big day when you tell your boss to find someone else, or signing up for a course that will put you on a better path. Each small move will get you closer to the life you actually want.
Breaking free from the nine-to-five isn’t easy, but it’s possible. I hope these steps give you the nudge to start building a path that feels right for you. Thanks for reading, and here’s to creating a future that’s all your own!
